As the Scriptures say, “People are like grass; their beauty is like a flower in the field. The grass withers and the flower fades. But the word of the Lord remains forever.” And that word is the Good News that was preached to you.
~1 Peter 1:24-25 NLT~
It seems like this fall has been death after death and then some. I know that the Lord is whispering names and calling people home to Heaven but I struggle and ask God why He is whispering the names of people I know or who have been in my life.
I am trying to trust in His perfect timing because that’s exactly what it is –perfect. Yet it really is a struggle. I am simply worn out, tear stained and growing weary and fatigued.
Sometimes, shutting the world out is the way I protect myself, even though it’s definitely not the best.
I have found myself in the trenches in the past and begged the Lord to call my name instead, to take me back. I have read Job and felt as though the Lord has walked away from me and doesn’t want me, not here or in Heaven and in a lot of ways this thought helped shape some of my beliefs. I believe that purgatory and hell exist. I believe that we are living that here on earth and that the unpublished gospel of Thomas saying that Heaven is a state of mind and something we can totally achieve on earth if we seek it, is true, however, I also believe that we need to seek God in order to achieve Heaven –anywhere.
So I will wait until He whispers my name. My ears will be open and I will love long and hard during the time He has gifted me to have whilst here.