Jan 212016
 

I had everything pulled off the counter and was wiping the far-to-reach corners of the backsplash while standing on a stood (short person problems) while she sat and talked to me from the table. I had planned to start dinner and then go sit down and hang out on the internet. Maybe watch some YouTube videos or scroll through social media, but instead I grabbed a rag and had started to scrub and before too long the counter was clean and even the crumb trays on the toaster had been wiped to a shimmering shine.

She talked and I talked back. We talked about school, how she finished her homework in her gym class because she can’t participate because of her knees, we talked about boys and “ships” and girls and their “ships” and all of that stuff. She showed me a few videos of what she found fun today and talked about her best friend not using his phone today while on the school bus so he could actually talk to him.

Yeah, I was present. I was present for the moments that make memories. I don’t want to be remembered for napping all the time and for being on my computer when I am conscious. I want to be present. I want to be the one that the kids talk to while dinner is being prepared. I want to help with their homework and learn about their interests.

It fascinates me that social media has given us this amazing gateway to be connected and yet we are excruciatingly disconnected from the ones that mean the most. I am not one who has their phone in their hand or beside them at all times. I don’t even have a phone. But, that’s not the point. I have spent so much time being depressed and hiding out, hiding behind the screen and fostering relationships with people I will likely never meet that I am guilty of neglecting the ones who sit right in front of me.

And while Jesus was The Gift, the ultimate Present. It was his presence that gave us redeeming grace. What would Jesus do? He would sit in the kitchen and talk over chores or leave the chores to wait. He wouldn’t say the internet is bad, but he would likely say real life is better.

Blessed be the name of the Lord!

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  11 Responses to “We Talked… Present”

  1. Oh, Marisa!!! So true and so convicting! Food for definite thought.

  2. I read a book back in December by Craig Groschel (founder of Life Church) called #struggles that goes along with the same issue of us being disconnected in the world but so connected in the digital world.

    your fmf friend parked at number 5

  3. A good point, Marisa, but there are those for whom social media is virtually their entire world…like me. My wife is typically the only person I speak with now, and her schedule is so full – and her work so demanding – that quality time is rare.

    I really have little else, and there are a lot of people in the same boat. It’s not a choice, but social media is a lifeline.

    #2 on FMF this week.

    http://blessed-are-the-pure-of-heart.blogspot.com/2016/01/your-dying-spouse-109-fmf.html

    • Andrew, being a stay at home mom it is definitely a lifeline for me too. I spend so much time online, probably upwards of 90 hours a week, maybe more if you start to include multitasking. It is my safe place and where I get to have “friends” but it was definitely an aha moment for me when i realized that something as simple as doing the dishes would get my kid out of her room and talking to me!! Maybe it will last, maybe it won’t. That’s in God’s control. I am just happy that He showed me a way to connect with her when she is home!!!

  4. Real life is much better! What a gift you both received by being present. I loved your story. Perfect prompt for you. Keep up the great work!

  5. Real life is so sweet. Relationships formed online have had a sweetness to them as well, though. Striking that balance between the two is very hard, though. Especially when we’ve got little ones who need attention and we don’t want to miss our moments with them!

  6. It’s so important to be present with those in our real lives. Sounds like a perfect night, I laughed at the talking about “ships” piece! 🙂 I’m in the #60 spot this week.

  7. Good words and very true.

  8. Stopping by from FMF. Thanks for your honesty and sharing lessons you’ve learned. I’m glad that you were able to find a way to connect with one of the gifts God has given you. She will never forget those moments. Little things do mean a lot!

  9. ah yes, ‘neglecting those right in front of me’
    there are days when I long for my connection with my dear internet friends. because sometimes It feels like they know me better than people in my real life. But that’s not always the case. i want to be present in the relationships I have in my hear and now. its easy to be overcome with fear that people will grow close to you and leave (that is my fear, its happened) but then you miss out on knowing these people for the time you have togetehr. i think its a constant battle friend.
    love that you and your girlie had this time together.

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